Many visitors to Jean's
room at the Zen Hospice have commented on the photo, reproduced above, and which offline is clear, handsomely framed, and prominently displayed. The attraction is probably its visual
response to the question everybody asks about all couples: why are these two
people together? Draped over each other
in happy exhaustion, smiling like we'd just pulled off the caper of the
century, the answer I read is: we enjoy each other shamelessly.
That is
"enjoy," ongoing, not "enjoyed," as in the good old
days. At the time of the photo, our
conceit was we fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. Fifteen years later,
we still fit, although the puzzle posed by life-threatening illness differs. Or perhaps we're so intertwined the metaphor
of edges snapping together does not entirely make sense. William Carlos Williams has a poem about the
long married, comparing us to ivy and an old brick wall, where you no longer
know where one ends and the other begins, and who is supporting whom. We're a bit like that.
Looking closely at the photo, I see Jean casually yet stylishly dressed, in a pose that is
somehow both relaxed and dynamic. The
smile on her face is warm, sensual, content, curious, all that in generous
doses. Heartbreakingly beautiful,
enduringly Jean.